Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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