well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
