So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
