You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
