i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
