Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
