you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
