That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
