i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
