Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
