what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
