Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
Randomize
