we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
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