Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
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