i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Operation Purity has been aborted
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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