We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
