Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
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