Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize
