Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Randomize
