SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I feel like abortions should bother me more
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
