so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
