There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
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