The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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