Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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