i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
