I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Randomize
