We need to rekindle our bromance
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
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