Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
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