drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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