If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize