you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
