Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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