I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
