5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
