shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
