Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
