Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Randomize
