Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize