yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
