I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
