I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
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