Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
and i looked up. we had an audience...
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Randomize