how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Randomize
