its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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