You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
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