i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
