This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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