the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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