I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
home. puking in laundry basket.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
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