He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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