She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize