Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Randomize
