I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
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